Wednesday, January 11, 2012

When Is The Right Time To Declare You’re “Dating”

Catching up with a buddy over coffee yesterday-my friend, who is French exclaimed that he has been so busy because of work, and because he’s been dating this guy. I was excited for my smelly cheese loving friend; it had been awhile since he’d been dating someone and I peppered him with questions about his new Hunka-Hunka Burning Love.

As my friend-let’s call him-Lil Sheba, gave me the skinny. The truth hit me like a Sea Breeze with too much breeze and no vodka. Lil Sheba told me that he had only been on three dates with this new love “Rambo” and that they hadn’t had sex yet; I hadn’t felt this letdown since the ending of “Lost” was a disappointment.

I tried to hold in my feelings and pretend (but like the promotion NBC is giving “Whitney” It made no sense) so I shut my mouth and tried to think of something positive to say. Suddenly seconds went by but it felt like hours; my stomach did a forbidden dance and my eyes watered until I told him how I felt, “I don’t think you can say you’re dating someone after 3 dates and definitely not until you slept with him.” I know, I should have, “Put a lid on it,” like Sister Rosetta use to tell me in 3rd grade.

Lil Sheba nibbled on a lemon tart and tried to explain himself, “it’s not all about sex.” of course I get that; but hello you have to be somewhat sexually compatible before someone gets the “dating” title, Because if 3 dates and no sex qualified as dating; I dated over 20 people last year; damn I’m hotter than I think.

With 2012 just starting I wanted to be a kinder, gentler me; a Hudson 7.0 or something so I tried to be more psychological about my friends wording (and to be honest this is not the first time my friend has said he was “dating” someone he hardly knew) Eventually Lil Sheba explained there is no French word for dating and after some laughs and debating we agreed on a simpler, “had a couple dates with this guy-I like him and we’ll see where it goes.”

I guess I shouldn't judge my smelly cheese loving friend so harshly; when i'm still waiting for "the Winchester brothers" from "Supernatural" to just make out already.


"Supernatural" actors; just because they are hot.
In the end I’m glad I said something; Lil Sheba was annoyed with me at first, but eventually was happy I clued him in on his wording. All joking aside I love my friend and don’t want people to think he’s flaky or worst yet, naïve.

Sometimes with friends you have to know when to be honest and other times know when to shut your big mouth. I wonder what you guys think.