Why Winter Sucks

This year the East Coast has seen a record number of snow and I for one am sick of it. I know what some cheery person will say, “I love the cold. I love the snow!” oh shut up! I’ll spill the baby formula here and tell you the truth; I like snow-when it first comes down, afterwards its turns into a black urine ice and it’s messy and gross, not to mention what the salt does to my fashionable shoes.
Here are my top reasons why winter sucks.

1. Bundling up: Coats, scarf’s, gloves, hats. I can’t even move or bend down if I drop something; guess I don’t need my cell phone.

2. Alligator Skin: Fabian looked into your eyes; he finally took you for more than just a friend; he touched your hands and coiled because they were so dry.

3. Dating Dudes: You get ready; you primp and feel nervous wondering what he’ll be like. After you kill yourself in the nasty, windy weather to get there. He shows up looking like a Gremlin. A nice walk home would cheer you up; you can’t, too damn cold.

4. Water Works: Runny nose + teary eyes=ugly